ah the yearning

A very sweet Mama from my mother's group gave birth to a divine sweet squishy little baby girl last Saturday.  I guess all mothers go through this time.  Wondering if one should or could have another baby.  Feeling that yearning to make your family grow.  I am so blessed to have had my own little squishy one. But you know, the monthly flow starts again and you start counting the days.

Hmmm.  But I am coming up to being closer to 50 then 40.  I have nothing to compare to, but I am so tired.  My body aches and I feel that somedays I wish I had more energy and vitality to keep up with my little one.

I am so excited about my son growing up , and being a fine young man.  I have a little weep sometimes and wish him a little brother or sister.  But more often I have clear visions of us being great friends.  Visions of us being travel buddies.  Going to exotic and adventurous places together such as Patagonia and Bhutan.  Being a witness to his emerging life and all its possibilties.

Words cannot really express my gratitude.


Linking in with Maxabella again this week.  Thank you.

xxxx

an anniversary and one month onwards

In the last month we have packed up and moved house that is a 3 hour drive south.  We moved on from our intense renovations and much treasured beachside house and community.  But also from a mortgage that was crippling us.  I do miss that life though.

Che had made some lovely little friends from the mother's group of the killer summer 2009/10.

We have had to rug up and find new paths to tread every day.

The rear of our rented cottage backs directly onto to Bowral Creek with a lovely gentle slope of a walk with views to the surrounding farms on the hillsides.

We have had a few issues with not wanting to eat our solids and just wanting to feed on the booby all the time.  Poor sausage having to deal with the move, strange house and Dada going away for 4 days and then getting our first real sickness with high temperatures of 40 degrees, no wonder.

We visited the local early childhood nurse for a weigh in check up etc   We now are 9.4 kg and 74 cm long.  And yes I know I do all the wrong things.  i.e  feeding to sleep, feeding through the night, not teaching him how to self settle, co-sleeping.  But its the only way I can manage and comfort him.  We are splurging out on a new bed.   King size and it is going to be lush.

Our little man is standing up and cruising around the furniture.  More concentrated effort has been required to baby-proof the house and the backyard.  I think Che's temperament is one of those superactive types.  We are trying  for him to do something with other kids most days.  Playgroup, kindermusic, swim lessons, storytime at local library and lots of walks in the bush.  He is a different baby after these activities.

Spring is here, but the weather has been very dramatic.  Lots of dark skies , soft constant drizzle. But I've decided to not winge about the weather.

Today our son is 10 months old.  So proud of you.  You make my heart melt.

I did say that in the new house,"no dogs on the couch".  Oh well, they've had it hard too.

  ps  now rewinding with Alison.  Hop along for a trip down memory lane for others too.
xxj

mothers group

Recently our mothers group has started catching up at our abodes rather than bracing ourselves outside coffee shops.  I had not seen all the lovely ladies and bubs for a few weeks and so it was so lovely having a bunch of us at my house.  It was cold wet and raining outside, but the fire made the house all toasty and there was a great feeling of merriment seeing all the bubs together playing on the floor.  Lots of tea and brewed coffee and yummy stuff to eat.

Such a great bunch of women I have to say.  Being a Doctor I have to be honest I felt hesitant and self conscious at first.  But I guess this is entwined with me actually accepting that yes I am a mother now .  I get so much from their friendliness and acceptance.

Reflecting back of my time here on the coast I have at many times felt very lonely.  Working full time, then feeling overwhelmed purshasing a derelict house that really was knock down needing so much time and money for it to be liveable.  Over committed financially.  I guess I am quite house proud and put pressure on us to get things done.  This made me stressed and not much time to explore opportunities locally.  How I ever fell pregnant during this time is a wonder. Too skinny, drinking too much, eating badly.

Now we are moving and feel very sad that we will not be close by to these lovely women and their children. I do hope we can keep in touch and have some reunion over the years.  Would be special for our little man I am sure.

We have plans of moving to the Southern Highlands to be close to Marty's parents for awhile. I am forever moving and this does make it hard to have a sense of community.  But who knows what is around the corner?