Saturday, May 29, 2010


Sorry something wrong with my blogger, as I am having problems uploading photos and writing text together.  Wanted to post many photos, could only post one.

So much rain it is a real test of your patience.  All these great plans, being extra organised. Having the house ready for sale. All so boggy.

We have finished our back deck ,made with spotted gum. Now putting the steps together in the rain.  We have been in the process of cleaning out the garage.  As most of our work has been done with recycled building materials we accumulated so much flotsam and jetsam.  My man is so keen on treasures along the roadside, it has become pathological.

Using freecycle we have made new homes for all the bits and pieces.  What a great service.  Even half empty tins of paint/degreaser/plastering materials.  Amazing.  It is a whole online community in itself.

The inside of our house looks like a chinese laundry as making an effort not to use the dryer.  We have the combustion fire going and if started early enough makes the house so toasty.  I have started decluttering the house and it feels good to have things looking more  streamlined and functional.  Hoping to redecorate with some good op shop finds.  But  the process can become quite draining, as not for us.

Our little  man has remarkably recovered from his fall. Hardly noticed the damage the next day.  I have done a big think about this whole starting of solids thing.   Our little man seemed so keen, but has not really enjoyed the whole puree thing.  As drummed into the contestants on Masterchef, food is all about texture and creating memorable moments.  I'm afraid rice cereal and green mush does nil for me, so why should it for him.  So after a lot of reading feel inspired to take the baby led approach, as always one's intuition leads back to this premise.  Some good inspiring stuff on tribal baby, thank you

Going to get wellies out and ventureto the veggie patch.  Rocket salad for lunch.


Rain that makes you sit and wait

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Today began with waking, feeling, "hey that was not such a bad night". Our son was happy to sleep by himself. He did wake once for a 3am feed/nappy change and then happy to go back down straight away. I have co-slept for 5 months and have over the last few weeks being making baby steps of putting him down when he is already asleep in his own room. From early on Che has been having daytime naps quite happily in his room/cot. Gently gently we have been making the transistion to blocks of time in the night as well. Usually around 3- 4am he wants to be awake and starts his kicking/acting out his new milestones and wants to be up, held and walked around for and hour or so. Lying in bed next to him was like being in a moshpit. It was torture. Last night he was peacefully resettled. He then awoke around 6.45am laughing and giggling to himself. My plan is to gradually reduce the breasfeeds after midnight as gradually solids are introduced.

Che was showing all the signs of being developmentally ready for solids. So this am sat him up in highchair, making pear and apricot puree. Turned my back and heard thud! There is baby lying flat on his face, on the floor, having hit the kitchen table on the way down. The mechanism on the front tray did not hold. He cried immediately. Wow the feeling of dread was so immense. Such a high pitched cry and distress. I quickly snuggled him into my breast for a feed and to then sit back and assess for any injuries. A big brusier along right brow. No broken skin, all limbs and organs intact. No signs of concussion.

I was actually trying also to get ready for work this am. Should I call and say cannot make it? Felt so bad. Your mind races wondering if any internal damage. You think the worst; even mild head injury can cause long term subtle problems with behaviour.

Managed to get to work. Managed lots of complex problems, home to my baby. He seems ok. But this afternoon having a big nap. Well not sure what this night might hold.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

in the light of day

In the light of day new strength is gained. New energy is siphoned from deep within. I am sleeping so poorly no wonder my son is so wakeful as well. Thoughts racing. The night seems to go on forever. Then the Kookaburras start their cocophony and yes everything will be ok. The day will arrive and I can move more forward. Where am I going. Destination unknown.

My baby is 5 months old today. This morning he reached up and put his fingers in my mouth as we lay together listening to the birds on the break of dawn. His smile melts my heart.

We have a gentle rhythm emerging in our daily ploddings. Che especially loves his walk in the morning and afternoon with his 2 pooches scurrying by his side. These days in the fall are so beguiling. They make one meditate and meander. Rather than trying to endur the extreme heat or cold.

Life and relationships and people can be so complicated. The innocence of a child makes me remember the simplicity of just being.

Monday, May 10, 2010

moving on

Happy Mothers day to all!

We had a lovely day , cooked brekkie in bed and getting our heads around our house, making it ready for sale. Still have moments of wondering how can we stay, but no we have moved on in our heads.

Constant lists going through our brains.

love being a Mom.


Sunday, May 2, 2010


Well so many jobs pulling at my brain. I am addicted to rumaging through everyones most beautiful blogs, feel bereft when it comes down to sitting and writing for myself. I decided to try as it looked like fun and also appears to be positively affirming to your very being? or is it a only a 2 dimensional sanitized version???
Anyway what I have set myself for this year is
1. mothering
2. being a better partner
3. living more simply, within our means
4. returning to work as a GP, have already started since bub was only 5 weeks old, has been a bit stressful
5. Continue to breast feed as long as possible. This has been challenging of late with working, expressing, and Che not concentrating on the job, lots of snacking and constant feding from midnight to dawn.
6. A biggy is we have decided to sell our house. We have put our heart and soul into this house, there was so much to do , probably beyond us. Falling pregnant was a huge surprise. Our energies and monies we want to have more for us as a family. So getting the house ready to look like something our of county style magazine has us obssessed on all the jobs to do. And it will not be for us. I hope we find a buyer that loves what we have done and can continue with the vibe, and not pull the old girl down.
7. Also am doing postgrad diploma of child health, requiring lots of updates and study. Am very much behind. But so sleep deprived.

Wish could be Mama baking cakes and pulling out a few weeds in vegie plot. Need to foster more creative thoughts.